I keep telling my friend Keri that I'm going to start blogging again, so I thought I better follow thru. It helps me get thoughts out of my head and share with people the struggles I have in hopes that maybe someone else feels the same and we can both find comfort in knowing we are not alone and learning together to make ourselves better people. Oh my that sounds really deep....
I walked into the gym last night and noticed a flier that read something like...."Rock your jeans challenge" so I inquire and learn that I need to bring in a pair of jeans that are two sizes to small (they cant zip or button and I have to prove this to staff) and then they keep the jeans, we have 10 weeks to lose weight and if our too small jeans zip and button our name goes into a drawing for prizes. Hmm so I feel I don't do well with competitions like this, I'm kind of a procrastinator and always wait til the last minute to do something, but with a challenge like this you cant wait til the last minute. Do I spend money on a great pair of jeans? or do I borrow jeans from someone? so I'm not out the money when I fail. I know that I should never use the word "fail" but come on lets be serious. You know how many times I have thought I could buy something smaller and it would motivate me to lose weight, bahahaha its never worked, so why would it now.
Ive learned over the last year how I tick as far as exercise and weight loss go. I do not like to compete against other people, like "whoever loses 10 pounds first buys the other a diet pepsi" that kind of motivation doesn't work for me, also I don't like it when people feel like they need to compete against me. I lose weight for one reason only, for myself. I will be honest and say that I don't like to get beat and occasionally this drives me, but what really drives me is bettering myself. (Like going a faster minute mile or doing pushups that I suck at) However I was at a race recently and a lady I had known thru the kids school was there and when she saw me she said "Oh wow are you running?" "Um yes" "Oh so have you trained for this?" "Um yes" and in my head I was thinking lady I hope I kick your ass or you trip and fall! Well needless to say I finished way ahead of her and thought to myself just cause I'm big doesn't mean I cant do what you can. Which leads me to another subject...
Why do I feel the need to explain myself? I went to the Eugene Running Store a few weeks back to get fitted for some good shoes, as soon as I started talking, I started rambling about how I really can run and that Ive lost 60 pounds and that Ive done some 5k's and a 10k blah blah blah and the guy was looking at me like...Who gives a rip woman, I just want to sell you shoes. When I meet people that don't know me, I feel like I have to give my whole history of "if you think I'm fat now, then you should have seen me 10 months ago" its stupid really, I don't owe anyone an explanation and honestly they don't really care and honestly I am assuming what they may be thinking. I am not trying to lose weight to impress anyone, to compete with anyone, to look better than anyone, I just came to a point in my life that I was so sick of feeling the way I do, seeing myself in that 3 way mirror and just feeling horrible and I still have those moments. I have a long way to go and its hard work. I look in the mirror and say...WTH and I get frustrated and want to perform plastic surgery on myself to get this ugly fat off. But Ive also learned that there are no quick fixes, sure you can binge diet, cut out certain things from your life, but what happens when you add them back in? I learned that it needs to be a life style change, the friends I have that have reached their goal say its just as hard to maintain their weight as it was to lose it. I believe that and I know this has to be my way forever. I have the exercise down to a T but the eating, UGH its sooooooo hard!
My insecurities get the best of me most of the time, I feel like since I post alot about my weight on face book that when people do see me they look at me like...hmmm gosh as much as she talks about working out, she ought to look better than that! I tell myself I don't care what people think, and really I shouldn't, but its human, but then I remind myself that I don't do what I do, for them so they can say what they want to say! So lets get back to this Jean challenge...
I'm going to do it! I'm not going to buy designer jeans, maybe some knock offs just in case they end up not even looking good when they do fit. I'm excited for a new challenge, I will not let the word "fail" be part of my vocabulary and I will be blogging my way thru this journey and also about my half marathon that I will be doing in May. I just printed off my training schedule and it gave me butterflies. When I was at the running store in Eugene there was a cute pink sticker that says "13.1" and I cant wait til I can go buy that and put it on my car...its the little things :)
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Monday, April 4, 2011
The Finale
I have to say I am kinda glad the Biggest Loser Challenge is over, as much as I need the push, I don't like the feeling of being in a competition, I don't do well with deadlines, I am a procrastinator by nature so when I have a deadline I wait til the end and then finish, cant do that with weight loss. When I started out the journey it was the motivation I needed, I had support and a cash prize in sight. In the end I got so much more....
When I first started WW, it was all about dumping off as much weight as I possibly could, as fast as I could. I have always heard that muscles weights more than fat so I was not going to exercise so it would come off faster. I lost 6 pounds the first week, so that was pure motivation. The more I would research, and talk to others, I realized in the long term, exercising really needs to be a part of my daily life. I want to be an active 80 year old, and I believe that exercise will help me achieve that, also gym workouts were a big part of Biggest Loser. I told you the story of Heidi, who invited me to gravity class and I was praying for it to be full, this class has actually turned out to be the best thing that has ever happened to me. I almost vomited the first day and I couldn't walk for days, but to me that is actually a good feeling knowing that my body is getting work it needs. But when you workout hard, and it kicks your butt, you would really hope the numbers on the scale would reflect that as well, its not the case for me. Some weigh ins, I would lose at all, sometimes I would make 2 pounds a week, it frustrated me beyond, because I was working so hard. I went in to weigh for Biggest Loser and Brenda (the trainer) measured me, from the last time I was measured, my hips and stomach area had gone down 10 inches! That made me smile! As much as I focus on the numbers on the scale I need to remember the gym work I am doing is paying off and building muscle, which in turn weighs more than fat, so I do use the the scale to see the progress, measuring is just as much a tool if not more to me. Lesson #1 learned
My routine consists of spin class 2 nights a week, gravity class 2 nights a week, spinning and jogging on Saturdays and jogging on Sundays...I started the jogging for cardio reasons, and to see how much I could actually do. Personally I find it boring, BUT I have never sweat so much in my life and that makes me feel great. I am not looking to do marathons, I am doing a 5k in California, and made that my goal. Last night at the gym I ran a 5k on the treadmill without stopping in 44 minutes. It makes me feel good that even tho I am still quite overweight I have the endurance to complete it. So with that the cliche of..If I can do it, you can do it comes to mind. Lesson #2 learned
My eating...UGH! This is probably the hardest thing ever for me. I want this to be a lifestyle change and I want it to be achievable. I mentioned above that in the beginning I wanted the weight off fast. I'm seeing that its not as easy at that. I like WW because I can eat whatever I want as long as it is within reason, and I just cant eat it ALL the time. Ive been on diets that had the food prepared for me, lost weight, gained it back. Ive been on diets that cut out carbs. white flour and sugar, lost tons of weight, gained it back. I cannot deprive myself of things, its not realistic for me. There is going to be times in life that I will want a piece of cake, and to have the mind set that I cant have cake, makes me want to have cake even more, and the mindset of when I'm done dieting and have lost the weight, then I can have cake, has been my mindset all along and what has put the weight back on. I discovered at Jessica's birthday party that I was enjoying the company of my family that I didn't even really need cake, so I opted out of it. I didn't miss it, and I felt good about not eating it. Saturday night, I went to dinner with some girlfriends and I really wanted a piece of chocolate cake and I had it. It played mind games with me at first, then I reminded myself, I was within my points and I had exercised an hour earlier that day. This is the way I want to live. Knowing that I can enjoy something, in moderation, and excising to offset my choices. Lesson #3 learned
My friends and family...The biggest thing and most unexpected to come from this challenge was the friends I made along the way and the support I received. I mentioned Heidi the spin chick in my very first blog, I had no idea how much of an impact Heidi would have on me. I used to see her all the time at Albany Christian, I always noticed her cause she dressed very stylish, I would see her at the gym and believe it or not, I'm not always outgoing, especially in a place I am intimidated so I really never talked to her, then she approached me in spin class and the rest is history. She pushes me, believes in me, goes out of her way to work out with me, and she is living proof that exercise and eating healthy WORKS! Along the way I also met Lissette, a hot Spanish beauty, who gives me a hug when I see her, and Becca who encourages me, and always smiles. These girls make me want to go to the gym everyday, makes such a big difference when you know your friends are there to laugh with, and understand the pain, and yell at you to keep going cause they believe in you. My friends outside the gym text me with encouragement, some of them have lost weight right along side me, my kids never complained that I go, Jake sometimes goes with me and does his homework and waves from the table. They both went jogging with me the other day and made sure I was ok. Erich always sends me texts from the academy to tell me good job, Jenny at work counts Weight Watcher points with me, Jeana is running the 5k with me, my mom picks up my kids from their activities so I can make it to the gym on time for a class. I am very lucky to have so much support, and kindness in my life. For the 1st time ever I feel like an achiever rather than a failure. Lesson #4 learned
On Facebook I posted that I lost over 17 pounds and 7% of my body weight on Biggest Loser and am at 28 pounds total since I started getting serious in January about losing weight. Our group tied for 2nd place out of 5 teams, we did a pretty good job. I won an award for losing the most weight since the last official weigh in, so that was pretty cool...I'm thankful for being asked to participate and now I'm ready to keep going.
I'm done blogging for now...I thought since I was a talker I would be blogging everyday, and maybe if I had access to a computer more often I would, but I wanted to complete at least this journey and I talk enough on Facebook for the whole town of Albany, I'm sure you will all know whats going on :) Thanks for taking this journey with me....
When I first started WW, it was all about dumping off as much weight as I possibly could, as fast as I could. I have always heard that muscles weights more than fat so I was not going to exercise so it would come off faster. I lost 6 pounds the first week, so that was pure motivation. The more I would research, and talk to others, I realized in the long term, exercising really needs to be a part of my daily life. I want to be an active 80 year old, and I believe that exercise will help me achieve that, also gym workouts were a big part of Biggest Loser. I told you the story of Heidi, who invited me to gravity class and I was praying for it to be full, this class has actually turned out to be the best thing that has ever happened to me. I almost vomited the first day and I couldn't walk for days, but to me that is actually a good feeling knowing that my body is getting work it needs. But when you workout hard, and it kicks your butt, you would really hope the numbers on the scale would reflect that as well, its not the case for me. Some weigh ins, I would lose at all, sometimes I would make 2 pounds a week, it frustrated me beyond, because I was working so hard. I went in to weigh for Biggest Loser and Brenda (the trainer) measured me, from the last time I was measured, my hips and stomach area had gone down 10 inches! That made me smile! As much as I focus on the numbers on the scale I need to remember the gym work I am doing is paying off and building muscle, which in turn weighs more than fat, so I do use the the scale to see the progress, measuring is just as much a tool if not more to me. Lesson #1 learned
My routine consists of spin class 2 nights a week, gravity class 2 nights a week, spinning and jogging on Saturdays and jogging on Sundays...I started the jogging for cardio reasons, and to see how much I could actually do. Personally I find it boring, BUT I have never sweat so much in my life and that makes me feel great. I am not looking to do marathons, I am doing a 5k in California, and made that my goal. Last night at the gym I ran a 5k on the treadmill without stopping in 44 minutes. It makes me feel good that even tho I am still quite overweight I have the endurance to complete it. So with that the cliche of..If I can do it, you can do it comes to mind. Lesson #2 learned
My eating...UGH! This is probably the hardest thing ever for me. I want this to be a lifestyle change and I want it to be achievable. I mentioned above that in the beginning I wanted the weight off fast. I'm seeing that its not as easy at that. I like WW because I can eat whatever I want as long as it is within reason, and I just cant eat it ALL the time. Ive been on diets that had the food prepared for me, lost weight, gained it back. Ive been on diets that cut out carbs. white flour and sugar, lost tons of weight, gained it back. I cannot deprive myself of things, its not realistic for me. There is going to be times in life that I will want a piece of cake, and to have the mind set that I cant have cake, makes me want to have cake even more, and the mindset of when I'm done dieting and have lost the weight, then I can have cake, has been my mindset all along and what has put the weight back on. I discovered at Jessica's birthday party that I was enjoying the company of my family that I didn't even really need cake, so I opted out of it. I didn't miss it, and I felt good about not eating it. Saturday night, I went to dinner with some girlfriends and I really wanted a piece of chocolate cake and I had it. It played mind games with me at first, then I reminded myself, I was within my points and I had exercised an hour earlier that day. This is the way I want to live. Knowing that I can enjoy something, in moderation, and excising to offset my choices. Lesson #3 learned
My friends and family...The biggest thing and most unexpected to come from this challenge was the friends I made along the way and the support I received. I mentioned Heidi the spin chick in my very first blog, I had no idea how much of an impact Heidi would have on me. I used to see her all the time at Albany Christian, I always noticed her cause she dressed very stylish, I would see her at the gym and believe it or not, I'm not always outgoing, especially in a place I am intimidated so I really never talked to her, then she approached me in spin class and the rest is history. She pushes me, believes in me, goes out of her way to work out with me, and she is living proof that exercise and eating healthy WORKS! Along the way I also met Lissette, a hot Spanish beauty, who gives me a hug when I see her, and Becca who encourages me, and always smiles. These girls make me want to go to the gym everyday, makes such a big difference when you know your friends are there to laugh with, and understand the pain, and yell at you to keep going cause they believe in you. My friends outside the gym text me with encouragement, some of them have lost weight right along side me, my kids never complained that I go, Jake sometimes goes with me and does his homework and waves from the table. They both went jogging with me the other day and made sure I was ok. Erich always sends me texts from the academy to tell me good job, Jenny at work counts Weight Watcher points with me, Jeana is running the 5k with me, my mom picks up my kids from their activities so I can make it to the gym on time for a class. I am very lucky to have so much support, and kindness in my life. For the 1st time ever I feel like an achiever rather than a failure. Lesson #4 learned
On Facebook I posted that I lost over 17 pounds and 7% of my body weight on Biggest Loser and am at 28 pounds total since I started getting serious in January about losing weight. Our group tied for 2nd place out of 5 teams, we did a pretty good job. I won an award for losing the most weight since the last official weigh in, so that was pretty cool...I'm thankful for being asked to participate and now I'm ready to keep going.
I'm done blogging for now...I thought since I was a talker I would be blogging everyday, and maybe if I had access to a computer more often I would, but I wanted to complete at least this journey and I talk enough on Facebook for the whole town of Albany, I'm sure you will all know whats going on :) Thanks for taking this journey with me....
Monday, March 14, 2011
Last Week til weigh in
So this is my last week before I weigh in on Friday. I definitely didn't blog as often as I would have liked to, but I'm also thinking alot of it would have been repetitive. Great week, bad week, I love exercise, I hate exercise blah blah. So maybe it was a good thing :) Since my last blog Ive lost another 2 lbs, which I guess is ok but it disappoints me a little. All of is lose weight differently and I'm learning that I need to look at things differently instead of focusing on the number on the scale. That number is so controlling, I watch it everyday and it alters my mood, if I'm down I think I'm Queen Latifah and if it stays the same or goes up I beat myself up for it and it ruins my day. That's just wrong! At WW this last week a lady shared with all of us that when she doesn't see the weight go down on the scale she writes down the changes that she has seen and I thought that was a great idea so I am going to do the same.
We went on a cruise in October and that's were I realized I needed to do something. I have a favorite pair of jean capri's and they wouldn't even go on at all and I couldn't take them on the cruise. I pulled them off the shelf this week and they went on and zipped and I wore them to dinner. That was huge! A pair of capri's I did wear on the cruise are way to big, but I like to wear them because it reminds me of what I've achieved. In April I am going with my mom and sister in laws to California, it is my Grandma's birthday but also a 5k walk for the Christian Home my Grandparents live in, so another test will be how the seat belt fits in the airplane. I fly somewhere at least 2 times a year and I always make a mental note of how the seat belt fits, maybe that's weird, but its what I do. So I'm excited to see how it fits compared to when we flew to our Cruise Ship. And the goal is to jog/run as much of the 5k as I can while I am there. Which takes me to the exercise part of things. I am beginning to really enjoy exercising, I didn't say LOVE it but enjoying it. I think exercise is just as or more important than the eating, just because a person is thin, doesn't make them healthy and in shape. My friend Heidi has been exercising for quite awhile, she has lost close to 90 pounds and she is doing her 1st triathlon in April. That is sooo awesome! She runs in the mornings, swims at lunch and then does spin class and other exercises in the evenings, its time for her to put them all together and accomplish something I only dream of. I have noticed how exercising has changed the shape of my body, how much more endurance I have, how much faster I walk, and confidence.
Weight Watchers doesn't restrict what a person can eat, just portion control. so I can eat anything I want, just not as much as I want, well that sounds like a big duh, but really its true. Its a lifestyle change not a "diet" I still have pizza, bacon, pancakes, I just have to pick and choose if that's what I really want and I may not be able to have a cheeseburger and pancakes and bacon in the same day. An example for you is that a slice of Pepperoni Pizza is about 8 points, I get 34 points in a day, so easily I can have 2 pieces for dinner, I just now don't eat it with ranch like I used to. None of us should be told we can never "have" something again just cause we are dieting, however you put M&M's in front of me I don't just eat one, so in honesty somethings I do stay away from cause I still lack self control. But I can buy a little bag of them for 6 points, IF I really really need a fix. So anyways all of this is just my personal revelation, things don't work the same for all of us, so I'm not telling anyone how to do anything, this is just whats been working for me.
As for water..BLEH BLEH BLEH Oh for Pete's sake I hate the stuff!! I know its so important to have and I drink 64 ounces of the yuck everyday, and sometimes even more. It has made me cut back on Diet Pepsi but I still drink at least 2 cans a day, which is better than the 12 pack I used to drink and that is not an exaggeration. Not to mention the 35 trips to the bathroom everyday, which is really inconvenient sometimes, but they say drinking water is a key to losing weight, I have to agree just not my favorite.
So Friday is the big weigh in day, I have 4 exercise classes to go before it gets here, I'm hoping I can work off a few more pounds, and just because the competition is over doesn't not mean my journey will stop. Ive only just begun and I'm excited to keep going. Last weekend I started walking for 1 min and then jogging for 1 minutes for a total of 30 minutes, I am determined to finish something, whether it be the 5k or just being able to jog 30 minutes straight without walking. Its good to have goals right?
So i feel this blog is a little random and maybe a bit "look at me" but I hope it doesn't come across like that, I just want people to know that we are all different, do things at a different pace, and we cant compare ourselves to anyone, nor should we judge how people go about things, and that goes for myself too. I'm learning more than just about weight loss in this journey, alot of the same things apply to parenting, and marriage as well. Hope you all have a good week and can find something this week, other than a number on the scale, that you have achieved :)
We went on a cruise in October and that's were I realized I needed to do something. I have a favorite pair of jean capri's and they wouldn't even go on at all and I couldn't take them on the cruise. I pulled them off the shelf this week and they went on and zipped and I wore them to dinner. That was huge! A pair of capri's I did wear on the cruise are way to big, but I like to wear them because it reminds me of what I've achieved. In April I am going with my mom and sister in laws to California, it is my Grandma's birthday but also a 5k walk for the Christian Home my Grandparents live in, so another test will be how the seat belt fits in the airplane. I fly somewhere at least 2 times a year and I always make a mental note of how the seat belt fits, maybe that's weird, but its what I do. So I'm excited to see how it fits compared to when we flew to our Cruise Ship. And the goal is to jog/run as much of the 5k as I can while I am there. Which takes me to the exercise part of things. I am beginning to really enjoy exercising, I didn't say LOVE it but enjoying it. I think exercise is just as or more important than the eating, just because a person is thin, doesn't make them healthy and in shape. My friend Heidi has been exercising for quite awhile, she has lost close to 90 pounds and she is doing her 1st triathlon in April. That is sooo awesome! She runs in the mornings, swims at lunch and then does spin class and other exercises in the evenings, its time for her to put them all together and accomplish something I only dream of. I have noticed how exercising has changed the shape of my body, how much more endurance I have, how much faster I walk, and confidence.
Weight Watchers doesn't restrict what a person can eat, just portion control. so I can eat anything I want, just not as much as I want, well that sounds like a big duh, but really its true. Its a lifestyle change not a "diet" I still have pizza, bacon, pancakes, I just have to pick and choose if that's what I really want and I may not be able to have a cheeseburger and pancakes and bacon in the same day. An example for you is that a slice of Pepperoni Pizza is about 8 points, I get 34 points in a day, so easily I can have 2 pieces for dinner, I just now don't eat it with ranch like I used to. None of us should be told we can never "have" something again just cause we are dieting, however you put M&M's in front of me I don't just eat one, so in honesty somethings I do stay away from cause I still lack self control. But I can buy a little bag of them for 6 points, IF I really really need a fix. So anyways all of this is just my personal revelation, things don't work the same for all of us, so I'm not telling anyone how to do anything, this is just whats been working for me.
As for water..BLEH BLEH BLEH Oh for Pete's sake I hate the stuff!! I know its so important to have and I drink 64 ounces of the yuck everyday, and sometimes even more. It has made me cut back on Diet Pepsi but I still drink at least 2 cans a day, which is better than the 12 pack I used to drink and that is not an exaggeration. Not to mention the 35 trips to the bathroom everyday, which is really inconvenient sometimes, but they say drinking water is a key to losing weight, I have to agree just not my favorite.
So Friday is the big weigh in day, I have 4 exercise classes to go before it gets here, I'm hoping I can work off a few more pounds, and just because the competition is over doesn't not mean my journey will stop. Ive only just begun and I'm excited to keep going. Last weekend I started walking for 1 min and then jogging for 1 minutes for a total of 30 minutes, I am determined to finish something, whether it be the 5k or just being able to jog 30 minutes straight without walking. Its good to have goals right?
So i feel this blog is a little random and maybe a bit "look at me" but I hope it doesn't come across like that, I just want people to know that we are all different, do things at a different pace, and we cant compare ourselves to anyone, nor should we judge how people go about things, and that goes for myself too. I'm learning more than just about weight loss in this journey, alot of the same things apply to parenting, and marriage as well. Hope you all have a good week and can find something this week, other than a number on the scale, that you have achieved :)
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Its been awhile....
I didn't blog at all last weekend when Erich was home with the computer, to be honest I didn't feel like it haha, and really no one even noticed. I'm learning thru this journey that really the one and only person you need to be accountable to is yourself! I thought by blogging and putting it out there for the people to see would help me stay on track, while some of it does there is the other side as to feeling like people are judging you and watching what you do, I can take it because I knew the consequences. Alot of it is speculation and as I learned a few years ago I shouldn't do that. But its really hard not to.
2 weeks ago I blogged and was going to weigh in that following Tuesday, I lost 2.6 or 2.8 pounds I don't remember exactly but it brought my weight loss total to 22 pounds and 15 pounds for the Biggest Loser Competition. I was excited and felt very motivated after I left there, thinking maybe next week I will lose 3 and make it to 25, which you get acknowledge at WW for that and I would blow by my 10% which you get acknowledged for that as well. Well it wasn't the case...I was sick the week prior and had a lot of coughing and wheezing so I laid of the exercise and for me, once I stop something its very hard for me to get back at it. I didn't exercise at all that week, my mom was in California so then I go to dinner with my dad, to make sure he eats more than cereal for dinner, so 2 nights in a row of eating out and then Friday night Erich came home and brought a friend from the academy and his wife so we went out to eat again, and still no exercising involved and I felt out of control with not knowing how many points were in my salad and then the bread that came along and then a french fry here and there...by the time Sunday rolls around I have the.....Screw it mentality. I know that I'm only hurting myself, the food taste wonderful don't get me wrong but I felt gross at night, bloated, uncomfortable and I end up getting so mad at myself. On Monday, Heidi and previously sent me a message on Face book telling me about a "gravity" class at the gym and said I should join. I responded back to her message, praying the class already started and it was to late for me to sign up, and then praying it was to full if I could sign up. She told me it started that Tuesday so I went to the gym and what do ya know, they had 1 spot. BLEH!!! :)
Tuesday I went to WW but I didn't weigh. I was afraid of the scale going up and I didn't want to see that, it blows my confidence, sorry that's just how I roll. I'm not the girl that looks at a gain and says...I will so beat that next week...I look at it and say....why do you even bother? So I didn't weigh and left class early to go to the 6:15 gravity class. I had no idea what I was getting myself into, and for Pete's sake it kicked my butt! Its a hour long class of basically doing weights with your own body weight..UGH! You can look the class up on YouTube if your interested to see how it works. After the class I felt like I was going to pass out, my arms killed, I felt dizzy but to be honest it felt GREAT! Even tho its painful its a good kind of pain. It was the motivation I needed and I am so thankful to Heidi for inviting me to the class and you all need to know that Heidi and Lissette who I take the class with are MY competition in the Biggest Loser, and they welcomed me and encourage me, and motivate me and for that I am so thankful. That is how it should be, I'm not competing against others I am doing this for MYSELF. I don't care if I win $250 and I don't care what people think of me if I have a bad week and maybe gain a pound. Its my Journey, and my story that I am willing to share that it may even help 1 single person. Any who enough of all that!
So my workout routine has consisted of Mon & Wed Spin Class and Body Sculpting for an hour and then Tues & Thurs Gravity Class for an hour and today for the first time ever I did a spin class for an hour straight. I can so feel it in my thighs but again its a good kind of pain. I am journaling my food and trying my best to make good choices, but if it takes me 2 years to get my weight off then so be it, I am doing the best I can and make mistakes, but I feel as long as you get back on it, you will succeed. Ive come to the conclusion that maybe I'm not ready to be out in a restaurant world, put food in front of me and I really have a hard time saying no thanks I will take lettuce! What sets food addiction aside from most others is that we NEED food to live, we don't need cigarettes, we don't need alcohol (however some are way funnier when they do use it) and we don't need drugs (illegal kind) so going to the grocery store or a restaurant can be difficult, its all about changing the lifestyle and making better choices and every week I learn something new. Hope you all have a good week next week and I hope to report a weight loss as of Tuesday, I think I have 2 more weeks til my official Biggest Loser weigh in, I need to get the official date. I get to go eat an apple now WOOHOO!
2 weeks ago I blogged and was going to weigh in that following Tuesday, I lost 2.6 or 2.8 pounds I don't remember exactly but it brought my weight loss total to 22 pounds and 15 pounds for the Biggest Loser Competition. I was excited and felt very motivated after I left there, thinking maybe next week I will lose 3 and make it to 25, which you get acknowledge at WW for that and I would blow by my 10% which you get acknowledged for that as well. Well it wasn't the case...I was sick the week prior and had a lot of coughing and wheezing so I laid of the exercise and for me, once I stop something its very hard for me to get back at it. I didn't exercise at all that week, my mom was in California so then I go to dinner with my dad, to make sure he eats more than cereal for dinner, so 2 nights in a row of eating out and then Friday night Erich came home and brought a friend from the academy and his wife so we went out to eat again, and still no exercising involved and I felt out of control with not knowing how many points were in my salad and then the bread that came along and then a french fry here and there...by the time Sunday rolls around I have the.....Screw it mentality. I know that I'm only hurting myself, the food taste wonderful don't get me wrong but I felt gross at night, bloated, uncomfortable and I end up getting so mad at myself. On Monday, Heidi and previously sent me a message on Face book telling me about a "gravity" class at the gym and said I should join. I responded back to her message, praying the class already started and it was to late for me to sign up, and then praying it was to full if I could sign up. She told me it started that Tuesday so I went to the gym and what do ya know, they had 1 spot. BLEH!!! :)
Tuesday I went to WW but I didn't weigh. I was afraid of the scale going up and I didn't want to see that, it blows my confidence, sorry that's just how I roll. I'm not the girl that looks at a gain and says...I will so beat that next week...I look at it and say....why do you even bother? So I didn't weigh and left class early to go to the 6:15 gravity class. I had no idea what I was getting myself into, and for Pete's sake it kicked my butt! Its a hour long class of basically doing weights with your own body weight..UGH! You can look the class up on YouTube if your interested to see how it works. After the class I felt like I was going to pass out, my arms killed, I felt dizzy but to be honest it felt GREAT! Even tho its painful its a good kind of pain. It was the motivation I needed and I am so thankful to Heidi for inviting me to the class and you all need to know that Heidi and Lissette who I take the class with are MY competition in the Biggest Loser, and they welcomed me and encourage me, and motivate me and for that I am so thankful. That is how it should be, I'm not competing against others I am doing this for MYSELF. I don't care if I win $250 and I don't care what people think of me if I have a bad week and maybe gain a pound. Its my Journey, and my story that I am willing to share that it may even help 1 single person. Any who enough of all that!
So my workout routine has consisted of Mon & Wed Spin Class and Body Sculpting for an hour and then Tues & Thurs Gravity Class for an hour and today for the first time ever I did a spin class for an hour straight. I can so feel it in my thighs but again its a good kind of pain. I am journaling my food and trying my best to make good choices, but if it takes me 2 years to get my weight off then so be it, I am doing the best I can and make mistakes, but I feel as long as you get back on it, you will succeed. Ive come to the conclusion that maybe I'm not ready to be out in a restaurant world, put food in front of me and I really have a hard time saying no thanks I will take lettuce! What sets food addiction aside from most others is that we NEED food to live, we don't need cigarettes, we don't need alcohol (however some are way funnier when they do use it) and we don't need drugs (illegal kind) so going to the grocery store or a restaurant can be difficult, its all about changing the lifestyle and making better choices and every week I learn something new. Hope you all have a good week next week and I hope to report a weight loss as of Tuesday, I think I have 2 more weeks til my official Biggest Loser weigh in, I need to get the official date. I get to go eat an apple now WOOHOO!
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Day 32
I thought I better blog before Erich leaves today back up to the academy. Otherwise I don't have access to a computer in the evenings. So I'm on Day 32 of the Biggest Loser competition, I have about 28 days left. My goal is to lose at least 24 pounds during this time. I weighed in on Friday at the gym, there was a mandatory weigh in half way thru. I have lost 11 pounds, which does not thrill me, but puts me half way to my goal and I still have half way to get there, so I need to keep it up. I was sick last week for a few days, had a fever, coughing miserably, so I didn't go to the gym for a few days. Tomorrow I am starting back to spin class and I'm actually looking forward to it. I weighed in at Weight Watchers last Tuesday night and I lost another 3 pounds there, so I have lost a total of 20 pounds on Weight Watchers and a total of 11 on the Biggest Loser Challenge.
A few of my accomplishments these past few weeks is counting points before I eat something. Lottie had made scones the other morning and I smelled them as soon as I walked in the office...I thought hmmmm I could have that for breakfast, and I actually got a little excited. Then something in my brain told me to count the calories (you will know why when I share my ice cream story) so I went to WW.com and got the points for the scones. 13 points! and that didn't include the Devon shire Cream she had sitting there next to them. Needless to say I ate my yogurt and Banana for 3 points total. It is so important to count things before you eat them, things can totally fool you. When I was sick over the weekend, Erich and the kids were gone and I was laying on the couch watching movies and I decided that I "deserved" real Ice Cream. I scooped up 2 cups of Mint Chocolate Ice Cream and ate it, started to feel guilty so I got up and calculated the points...16 Points! I get a total of 35 points for a day...so that's really alot for really doing nothing for me other than making me feel bad. Don't get me wrong, I think we all can have a treat, and everything is ok in moderation. But I really didn't even need this, It was about my feelings again....so I was proud of myself for staying away from the scones. To be honest Im not even a scone lover, it just smelled like heaven! The other accomplishment was hitting my 10 pound goal, I went to Old Navy and bought myself a pair of $14.50 yoga pants. I love them! I think I have over worn their welcome already, but they are so comfortable and I can wear them to exercise and to Jake's games and still look a bit hip. SO now for my next 10 pound goal? I really don't know....hmmm if you guys have any ideas let me know. I want it to be something affordable and something I wouldn't go do normally, I just cant think of something right now.
Everything is going ok with Erich being gone, I am busy every night of the week doing something with the kids, haven't had time to paint my room or even cut out my quilt, I have the fabric but no motivation at night. He is doing well in the academy, he has found a good friend and that makes it better for him. He comes home on the weekends and was able to take Jake to his Little League draft yesterday and him and I went to a Valentine Gala last night. Don't worry about me overeating there since I sat next to Jena haha. Part of me isn't kidding but really I am. Its good to have people around us to hold us accountable, but I know that she wouldn't judge me so really I'm kidding. I'm thankful for her support and I'm glad she is always there :)
I hope you all have a great week and have a fun Valentines Day, I now go get to see the Justin Bieber movie with my daughter, I'm trying to act excited lol. At least I have Misty to visit with. I will check back as soon as I can.
A few of my accomplishments these past few weeks is counting points before I eat something. Lottie had made scones the other morning and I smelled them as soon as I walked in the office...I thought hmmmm I could have that for breakfast, and I actually got a little excited. Then something in my brain told me to count the calories (you will know why when I share my ice cream story) so I went to WW.com and got the points for the scones. 13 points! and that didn't include the Devon shire Cream she had sitting there next to them. Needless to say I ate my yogurt and Banana for 3 points total. It is so important to count things before you eat them, things can totally fool you. When I was sick over the weekend, Erich and the kids were gone and I was laying on the couch watching movies and I decided that I "deserved" real Ice Cream. I scooped up 2 cups of Mint Chocolate Ice Cream and ate it, started to feel guilty so I got up and calculated the points...16 Points! I get a total of 35 points for a day...so that's really alot for really doing nothing for me other than making me feel bad. Don't get me wrong, I think we all can have a treat, and everything is ok in moderation. But I really didn't even need this, It was about my feelings again....so I was proud of myself for staying away from the scones. To be honest Im not even a scone lover, it just smelled like heaven! The other accomplishment was hitting my 10 pound goal, I went to Old Navy and bought myself a pair of $14.50 yoga pants. I love them! I think I have over worn their welcome already, but they are so comfortable and I can wear them to exercise and to Jake's games and still look a bit hip. SO now for my next 10 pound goal? I really don't know....hmmm if you guys have any ideas let me know. I want it to be something affordable and something I wouldn't go do normally, I just cant think of something right now.
Everything is going ok with Erich being gone, I am busy every night of the week doing something with the kids, haven't had time to paint my room or even cut out my quilt, I have the fabric but no motivation at night. He is doing well in the academy, he has found a good friend and that makes it better for him. He comes home on the weekends and was able to take Jake to his Little League draft yesterday and him and I went to a Valentine Gala last night. Don't worry about me overeating there since I sat next to Jena haha. Part of me isn't kidding but really I am. Its good to have people around us to hold us accountable, but I know that she wouldn't judge me so really I'm kidding. I'm thankful for her support and I'm glad she is always there :)
I hope you all have a great week and have a fun Valentines Day, I now go get to see the Justin Bieber movie with my daughter, I'm trying to act excited lol. At least I have Misty to visit with. I will check back as soon as I can.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Confessions of a FOODIE!
Its been awhile since I blogged, frankly I sucked at eating properly for a few days last week, and didn't want to blog about it. My schedule changed a bit last week, which made it impossible for me to get to spin class and everything seemed to spiral down hill from there. I didn't have the right groceries in the house, I worked a few 10 hour days, kids had activities in the evenings and I just grabbed for anything and didn't care. And to be honest when I only lost 1.9 pounds when I really tried I thought whoopie that's really nothing anyways. But really who am I hurting? Only myself, its not like anyone else cares if I put the weight back on, they will just say. I knew she couldn't do it. Jena text'd me and set up a group workout Saturday morning, now by this time I hadn't exercised since Monday night, so I knew I would be dying. So I showed up and it was so good to visit with the girls before hand, knowing that everyone struggles and got some good ideas, I totally recommend a some kind of group support whether it be weight watchers or just talking to your friends. Saturday we had 2 parties to attend, I was a little nervous and Ive never been good at eating before I go and saying no to what is around me, I seriously should not be allowed in public at this stage. I tried to behave but probably had more that I should have, but just thought, Sunday is a new day, you can go get groceries, start fresh and be good to go. We met up with Jena and her husband on Sunday, we got to talking about the BL competition and WW and then she asked "CAN I SEE YOUR JOURNAL" Wha? Um...sure. Yikes, but I'm glad she did and I so need the accountability, and after further discussion I found out that its possible we each win $500 of we take this thing. Now wouldn't that just be awesome. So definitely time to step it up.
Erich has left for the academy, I bought some material over the weekend to make a quilt, I plan on painting our bedroom and the kids have tons of dancing and basketball to keep me occupied in the evenings. Evenings are my worst time of day to over eat, and with Erich being gone I don't go to bed very early cause by nature I am a total night owl and love the peaceful time after the kids go to bed. So I thought it would be wise to keep myself occupied with some constructive projects, rather than eating bon bons and watching Hoarders every night, which honestly sounds heavenly haha.
I wont be able to weigh at WW tomorrow night, Jake has a game in Sweet Home right at 5:30, so I'm going to weigh in Saturday morning, hoping to make it to at least my 10 pound goal, so I can get a cute outfit, I'm tired of looking scroungy at the gym, not that I have to look all cute, but it feels good to take a little pride in ones self and at least wear sweats that have no paint on them :) Erich took hi laptop with him and until I get a new battery for mine I don't know how often I will blog, right now I'm doing it from work, and as long as I don't get in trouble, I will try to do it from here. So this afternoon is spin class and toning and I am actually excited to get back to it. I'm gonna say its ok to have some rough days, don't beat yourself up and get right back on!
Erich has left for the academy, I bought some material over the weekend to make a quilt, I plan on painting our bedroom and the kids have tons of dancing and basketball to keep me occupied in the evenings. Evenings are my worst time of day to over eat, and with Erich being gone I don't go to bed very early cause by nature I am a total night owl and love the peaceful time after the kids go to bed. So I thought it would be wise to keep myself occupied with some constructive projects, rather than eating bon bons and watching Hoarders every night, which honestly sounds heavenly haha.
I wont be able to weigh at WW tomorrow night, Jake has a game in Sweet Home right at 5:30, so I'm going to weigh in Saturday morning, hoping to make it to at least my 10 pound goal, so I can get a cute outfit, I'm tired of looking scroungy at the gym, not that I have to look all cute, but it feels good to take a little pride in ones self and at least wear sweats that have no paint on them :) Erich took hi laptop with him and until I get a new battery for mine I don't know how often I will blog, right now I'm doing it from work, and as long as I don't get in trouble, I will try to do it from here. So this afternoon is spin class and toning and I am actually excited to get back to it. I'm gonna say its ok to have some rough days, don't beat yourself up and get right back on!
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Disappointment :(
By the title I'm sure you can see that I failed to reach my 3 pounds. I lost 1.6. Yeah so its a loss and I should be proud, and when I add the 8 from last week and today's weight loss 9.6 pounds in 2 weeks is pretty good. But I just cant help but to be disappointed. I worked my BUTT off literally! I didn't miss one day of working out, and kept my food journal up to the points. The trainer at the gym told me that when you begin to work out your muscles will retain water...yeah I believe her but still! It doesn't make me wanna quit, but it does leave a little sour taste in my mouth.
I went to dinner with my dad tonight and had the BBQ Chicken salad, dressing on the side and took off the french fried onions. It was a good choice and I am proud of that, however I did eat a slice of pizza when I got home :( It was all within my points just not the healthiest, I guess I loathe in self sabotage, and that my friends is the biggest hurdle I need to jump, its ridiculous...Its like I need to go to Borders and have a new tape installed in my brain, a self motivating, positive, you can do it cassette. Its all good, tomorrow is back to spin class and tracking my points.
On a other note, I had asked on Facebook to pray for my co-worker Lottie as she was going thru some medical testing, let me just fill you in on who Lottie is. She is my moms age and came to work with us a few years ago. Our desk were right by each other and we talked ALL DAY....(then I got moved in with the big guns) I love her, she is like my other mom, she was there for me during one of the toughest times in my life and she cried with me, prayed with me, and loved me. She is having some issues with her leg and after a few doctors they came to a conclusion that she might have ALS (Lou Gerigs Disease) it made my heart so sad. She went today to get results of blood work and electric shock treatments of some kind and they decided that it is not what they thought, and they are referring her to a surgeon to have back surgery. She sent me a text right before weight watchers tonight to let me know, that things look like they will be ok. YAY! I was so happy to hear the news, no one wants to see a loved one go through anything terrible. So thank you to those who prayed..God is good all the time and all the time God is good :)
So this blog is bittersweet, boo to the little weight loss...yay to tomorrow being a new day and some great news. Oh and boo to me not getting a new workout outfit yet either, since I'm .4 lbs away from 10. Grrrr! Next week it is on!
I went to dinner with my dad tonight and had the BBQ Chicken salad, dressing on the side and took off the french fried onions. It was a good choice and I am proud of that, however I did eat a slice of pizza when I got home :( It was all within my points just not the healthiest, I guess I loathe in self sabotage, and that my friends is the biggest hurdle I need to jump, its ridiculous...Its like I need to go to Borders and have a new tape installed in my brain, a self motivating, positive, you can do it cassette. Its all good, tomorrow is back to spin class and tracking my points.
On a other note, I had asked on Facebook to pray for my co-worker Lottie as she was going thru some medical testing, let me just fill you in on who Lottie is. She is my moms age and came to work with us a few years ago. Our desk were right by each other and we talked ALL DAY....(then I got moved in with the big guns) I love her, she is like my other mom, she was there for me during one of the toughest times in my life and she cried with me, prayed with me, and loved me. She is having some issues with her leg and after a few doctors they came to a conclusion that she might have ALS (Lou Gerigs Disease) it made my heart so sad. She went today to get results of blood work and electric shock treatments of some kind and they decided that it is not what they thought, and they are referring her to a surgeon to have back surgery. She sent me a text right before weight watchers tonight to let me know, that things look like they will be ok. YAY! I was so happy to hear the news, no one wants to see a loved one go through anything terrible. So thank you to those who prayed..God is good all the time and all the time God is good :)
So this blog is bittersweet, boo to the little weight loss...yay to tomorrow being a new day and some great news. Oh and boo to me not getting a new workout outfit yet either, since I'm .4 lbs away from 10. Grrrr! Next week it is on!
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